Users and Takers

Don't you just love it when a concise phrase sums up an important point? Well, maybe you don't but I do (I must admit I am easily amused). God jogged my memory recently by reminding me of the transformational vs transactional dynamic of relationships in the kingdom. This phrase is most commonly used to describe leadership models in business etc. Just do a Google search on it. Google said I got 447,000 references to it and it only looked for .36 seconds.

However I want to use it to describe our personal relationship with people. As disciples of Jesus we have been called to help people. We aren't perfect but we are in a kingdom of light that is called to shine into the darkness (Ephesians 5:8, Colossians 1:12,13). We have been called to be transformational in our lives in this world. We don't just exist, we exist to change the world we live in.

Yet, the most common interactions we have with people are transactional. What I mean is that often our agendas in our relationships are a transaction whereby we are giving so that we can......

  1. get other people to do something to benefit us. USERS
  2. get money, gifts or other stuff from others. TAKERS
  3. find people to make us feel good. "LIKE A CAT" ERS (my cat does this all the time)
  4. get a balanced return act. "TIT FOR TAT" ERS
Transactional relationships are ones where people are tying to see what they can get. The best response is when you get a good transaction (you get what you want ... after all, it is all about you, right?). It is very limited in what it can do to really help people.

Jesus calls us to transformational relationships. He said it in Matthew 5:16. We are to live, associate, work with people in such a way that it transforms them (and us as well). “Live such good lives among the pagans that, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.” 1 Peter 2:12, NIV. 

One aspect of transformational living that has a huge impact is when disciples of Jesus like you and I do the UNEXPECTED like the following .......
  1. Love our enemies instead of hating them.
  2. Forgiving people even before they ask for it.
  3. Suffering an injustice instead of standing up for our rights.
  4. Being inclusive when people expect you to be exclusive.
  5. Being kind to strangers rather than suspicious.
This is what Jesus did isn't it? Eating with embezzlers and "sinners". Talking to a Samaritan women in public. Teaching in the secular marketplace. Suffering torture when He could have easily prevented it. 

This sort of behaviour in the name of Christ transforms people. We will be come a transforming Kingdom when we learn to live the life Christ has called us to and get away from trying to ring up transactions with  people. 

http://georgelittlejourney.blogspot.com/
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